Windows Vista…

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Me:

“No, windows, please turn off that spinning ring thing and actually respond”

5 minutes later…

“Hold in power button for 4 seconds – perform forced reset”

Reboot….

5 minutes later…

“FFS Windows Vista, you bag of shite… Increased task stability my arse… increased startup time my arse… you sack of pretty but pointless crap will you respond?”

Eventually…. it boots…

5 minutes later…

“No please don’t load Media Player, I don’t want that loading… Why are you loading media player?”

STOP loading media player, why doesn’t this little [X] icon work?

“Windows Media Player has stopped responding”… OK, close it.

“Windows Media Player has stopped responding”… OK, close it.

“Windows Media Player has stopped responding”… OK, close it.

“Windows Media Player has stopped responding”… OK, close it.

“Windows is checking for a solution to this problem”… “No Windows, DON’T CHECK FOR A SOLUTION JUST CLOSE THE F**KING TASK WHEN I ASK”

“Windows Media Player has stopped responding”… OK, close it.

“Windows Media Player has stopped responding”… OK, close it.

CTRL+ALT+DEL

“Windows is unable to start security options”

“OK…. How the F**K do I actually get to frigging close this pissing task then?”

…. and it went on…

Until EVENTUALLY, after about 15 minutes it started responding.

XP does this, but at least you can crash a task without waiting for the black screen of scary biscuits.

I hate vista.